I'm a baker, not a candlestick maker. I bake cakes and cupcakes and sell them to people or give them away. I do it for the money and I do it for the pleasure of the sweet -- the feel of the batter, the flow of the icing, the pleasure of the perfect meringue, the gloss of the chocolate, the tender crumb. I have to be able to bake in the midst of it all, though, measure the flour and remember the sugar, count the eggs and remember the baking soda or was it powder? Is that Sophie who just made that bang or was it the boys? I put the tins in the oven and put Sophie's shoes on and while the timer ticks, I take her around the block, tire her out so that she can sit in her wheelchair, gladly, while I mix the frosting and pull the pans out of the oven and leave them there to cool and her to rest.
This is how we do it.
And when Sophie is up and wandering in her room, aimlessly, bumping into the closet door, seeking sensation and flirting with danger, the mixer is on in the kitchen and I feel tense, straining to hear over the whir, I call on the boys, the ever-patient boys, the boys whose lives I try to protect, try to shield, ever balancing the reality of the situation she is disabled and she is your sister and they have their own lives to live and will not be responsible, too responsible, they answer yes, mom and I ask them to watch her, watch her while I put this in the oven, watch her please make sure she doesn't fall off the couch, let her watch you, let her be with you, pay attention to her, please watch her just for a minute, just a sec.
That is how we do it.
|Lavender, Vanilla and Coconut Cupcakes|
(not pictured - Intense Chocolate Chocolate Chip Cupcakes)
How We Do It - Part I HERE.