Saturday, February 28, 2015

Laissez-faire Parenting, Part 435: Boy Talk





As we drove around the shitty today, I listened to Oliver chattering endlessly about the cars we passed, and I nodded my head while maneuvering the sexy Mazda and turned toward him at the stoplight when it turned red. You've got something black in your teeth, I said to him, and then like a reflex, have you brushed your teeth today? (it was late afternoon, and the sky ahead was pinking up for sunset). And then he said in a very good-natured tone, not at all miffed or even with the customary annoyance -- actually quite to the contrary -- but rather proudly, I've actually brushed my teeth at least once a day for about two weeks straight! Reader, he waited a beat, a beat that I thought was for me to fill in with the usual parenting jargon about teeth-brushing and hygiene, the beat that his brother, if present would have filled with You're a disgusting pig, but before I could begin, the light turned green, I had turned my head back to the road and simultaneously realized that we were both supposed to feel good about this diligence on his part. I used to NEVER brush my teeth! he said as I smoothly drove the sexy Mazda forward, and then he turned his head out the window and commented on the baller Tesla that roared by us.

9 comments:

  1. I do love that boy. My 12-year old is proud if she showers once a week, so I feel you. And her older sister often reminds her that she is disgusting. And I fully subscribe to the whole notion of laissez faire parenting. Anything that keeps my blood pressure down...

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  2. Benign neglect- works for both plants and children. Mostly.

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  3. I don't know which I like better - "You're a disgusting pig" or the "baller Tesla."

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  4. Boys...Gotta love'em...Baller Tesla indeed.

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  5. Oliver is my hero in so many ways.

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  6. When my son was Oliver's age he didn't see the point of baths. He'd go in the bathroom, turn on the shower, then turn it off and come back out with the water never having touched his skin. And then puberty and the need for deodorant and then he understood the need for showers. Nature takes care of these things.

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  7. i'd feel good if my 16 yo were diligent enough to pick up his dirty laundry without my asking!

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