Wednesday, April 22, 2015
Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions* and Some Observations**
(The well-meaning stranger)
What's wrong with your daughter?
She has a rare form of epilepsy.
Can't they give her something for that?
What a great idea! I'm going to call the doctor first thing!
(The man popping peanuts at a cocktail party)
Does your daughter feel love?
No, but she does feel hate, and you'd better move out of the way because she's a really good shot.
(The social worker doing a conservator interview)
Does Mom let Sophie make her own decisions regarding her sexuality and marriage?
No! I've already arranged for her to be married to my oldest gay friend so that she can get some decent health insurance benefits!
(The Neurologist standing in hallway of hospital)
Have you thought about the drug choices I gave you as the next treatment for Sophie?
Yes, and I think I'm going for the one that can cause aplastic anemia instead of the one that causes blindness, and I'm not sure whether the other one is right for a six month old. Doesn't it have pretty bad long-term cognitive side effects?
Well, what's a few points drop in IQ really matter?
Probably not much in her case since she's already told me how to construct a bomb and blow up your office!
We live in a country that likes to drop bombs, both literal and figurative, and then clean things up and rebuild afterward. This observation pertains to wars (Iraq), vaccination "science," cancer treatment, pharmaceutical companies, the medical-industrial complex, the tobacco industry, fast food companies, anti-obesity efforts, etc.
When you engage with A Neurologist, you have to do a certain amount of suspending your belief that these are people with advanced degrees and therefore able to make intelligent inferences that don't involve their egos or ties with certain pharmaceutical companies.
(in response to SB277 passing through committee)
I'm interested to know if the California government plans on chasing down those families who choose to delay or decline vaccinations for their children and themselves. Will they carry syringes as they run after us? Will all public places be verboten for those of us who refuse to get a mandatory flu shot? Will herd immunity be strengthened? I saw a pig fly the other day.
Obduracy and control go hand in hand.
On Friday I will be attending my 17th Individualized Education Plan for Sophie, and other than expressing my gratitude to her teacher and aide, I don't give a shit what happens in it. I plan on bringing donuts and, perhaps, a flask of bourbon. I will, as usual, wear a leotard and do my customary tightrope walk routine.***
*All questions are factual. Answers were inside my tiny little mother mind.™
**All observations are from my tiny little mother mind™ and should only be construed as opinion, except for the first part of Number 5 about gratitude and not giving a shit. Those are facts.
*** More observations on what happens at this meeting are forthcoming.