Saturday, April 7, 2018

Gratitude Schmatitude



I'm not going to lie. I've been feeling about as low in general as I've ever felt, and rather than going through it all here (as I've done ad nauseum for many, many years), I'll just tell you that yesterday was a doozy in nearly all respects, that I spent a good many hours plumbing the dark side and didn't have any expectations that I'd be doing anything other than spelunking for the rest of my life. Have ya'll ever spelunked? I did many moons ago, when I was a painfully awkward preteen. I lived in Georgia, and as I recall it now, the weather was grotesque, hot and humid, but despite this, my mother had signed me up for a number of Red Cross activities which included canoeing, lifesaving and spelunking. As my regular readers know, I was a terrible athlete and preferred reading to just about any other activity, so slithering through a red clay tunnel was not something that I even remotely enjoyed. I do remember, though, that it was surprisingly cool in those tunnels and that I was actually pretty good at spelunking, namely because I was skinny. Yes, I was actually skinny back then and good in the dark, probably confident that light would come.

But I digress.

I know there are plenty of ya'll out there who espouse the whole gratitude thing, and while I've dipped into it now and then as a thing, I'm more prone to feeling gratitude for real, as opposed to a practice, and that's because I actually have so much for which to be grateful. In other words, it's not hard for me to feel grateful, even as I feel like shit or shit's raining down. Also, I was once a Catholic. I imagine only lapsed or former Catholics get the full gist of that statement.

The groove that my forehead has worn in the tile of my shower got a little action yesterday, as did the plumbing. Lots of tears. I am certain, during these times, that bitterness, resentment and overwhelming sorrow will take me over. You figure out which of those sentences are hyperbolic.

Then I opened my mail. I ordered the above pictured book a few weeks ago. It was published by the folks at gratefulness.org, or A Network for Grateful Living, an online site that I've had the pleasure of reading and then being a contributor off and on for many years. I always felt like a bit of an imposter when my writing appeared on their site, mainly because of the above -- the bitterness and resentment, the gratitude schmatitude thing and my own skill at spelunking. I ordered the book because what they do at gratefulness.org is a beautiful thing, and I want to support them. So, I'm flipping through the book, reading beautifully illustrated quotes by the Buddha and Barack Obama, by Brene Brown and Maya Angelou, Desmond Tutu and Mother Theresa, when I come upon -- well -- me.



I swear I'm not telling you this as an act of self-promotion or even as a humble brag. I'm telling you this because I was feeling as low as I've ever felt as I flipped through this small book, and I had no idea that my words would be excerpted in it. My initial response was to burst out laughing at all the world's absurdity, particularly my own.*

There are no accidents, my friend Carrie Link has said.

Yes, I felt buoyed by the support and restored by the acknowledgement. I felt released by laughter. Mostly, though, it occurred to me that even the great sages with whom I was absurdly placed must have periods where they, too, are stuck in dark tunnels, crushed by the earth, that all of us share this humanity and that we are humbled by one another and, of course, completely grateful for one another. For real, not as a thing.


You can order Everyday Gratitude here. Please support them because they're doing beautiful work in this world.













* The index of contributors places me after Maya Angelou and before Joan Baez. I know it's alphabetical, but ya'll!

24 comments:

  1. If that had been me, I would probably just think, "Well. Now I can die happy."
    What an honor and how deeply deserved.
    And if anyone in this world gets "gratitude schmatitude" it is me.
    Love you dearly. And am grateful for you. In the real sense.

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  2. Well those great people are in good company :)

    What a story.

    I love the colour and the text - they did a good job, of illustrating and of choosing to include your words. I'm good at both the misery and gratitude, I think, but I have no idea how to let them fly away.

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  3. Oh my God I love this!!!! This is fantastic! Those gratitude people, they know sages when they hear and read them. Ordering the book now because, well, my friend Elizabeth is in it. And she's a spelunker, and wise.

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  4. For real! There's nothing compares to for real.

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  5. Elizabeth, this made my day. You deserve to be among the greats quoted in this book. I’m glad that it came at the perfect time.

    Your thoughts, perfectly worded in your quote, is what I have been mulling over the last few days. This is the reason you are an author and I, a humbled reader.

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  6. I'd like to come across one of your quotes in a beautiful book. Wishing you a better day ahead.

    Best,
    Bonnie

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  7. What an amazing quote... and the serendipity of seeing your own words right when you needed them. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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  8. I've been trying to welcome gratitude in all the "times" and sometimes I find, it is possible. But I think you are right, that all of us sing along the spectrum from darkness to light, spelunking and sailing. So awesome to have your own words come flying back to you just when needed. So many congrats.

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    1. 'that all of us sing along the spectrum from darkness to light, spelunking and sailing.' Brilliant and perfect.

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  9. Thank you for this reminder today. I needed it. Misery I got, gratitude needs work right now.

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  10. And I'm sorry life has been shit lately. You're a strong woman Elizabeth, but it's just so hard when life gets dark. Sending hugs.

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  11. That's just wonderful, Elizabeth. Life sure is funny, sometimes, isn't it?

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  12. Great stuff! You deserve this.

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  13. Thanks for helping me let go of my cynicism for a moment or two.

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  14. Replies
    1. Sarah - This is me. This is our new book. Elizabeth is our extraordinary old friend. Great to see you here in the light of shared appreciation. Be in touch. Kristi Nelson

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  15. What an amazing, and perfectly timed upper! I hope its effects last a long time.

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  16. I am in agreement with your Friend, there are no accidents. It is perfect timing like this which give me such a Peace when I am particularly low. There is no telling how many have been uplifted by your quote and perhaps also at just the right time when the words made a personal connection. I do believe it is hard to keep a grateful heart down, if it is not a natural state of Being then perhaps it becoming a Practice for someone who doesn't naturally experience it would be a good thing. I do hope you the darkness lifts for you soon, in our humanity it does come to everyone I think, we just sometimes imagine it doesn't when we personally feel isolated by it.

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  17. Well, I for one, believe there ARE accidents! We may CHOOSE to find the grace, the silver lining, in them, and this attitude is the rope that pulls us up. There is no grand plan, I believe. How could there be? But we can be our own light, and a light to others, and THAT, Elizabeth, is surely what you are.

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  18. How cool! Well, that seems like a pretty effective antidote to being down -- being sandwiched (nominally) between Maya Angelou and Joan Baez! Congratulations. :)

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  19. Gratitude for the good stuff is easy. Gratitude when everything is flowing along with our expectations - check. It's the gratitude we must find in the midst of the hard knocks and misery that elude me. You are my teacher in this. You are the masterclass of gratefulness. Brother David says this is where spiritual growth lives. Where real grateful living lives. Of course you are nestled lovingly between Angelou and Baez. Who else could do it?

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  20. So pleased that it happened this way - all of it. You know how I feel about gratitude, and I too was once a Catholic, so I will be putting my head against the cool tile in my shower today and sending you a psychic message to remind you just how brilliant you are. XOXO

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