tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post7147209673401708097..comments2024-01-01T20:33:52.554-08:00Comments on a moon, worn as if it had been a shell: Where You AreElizabethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03313726816776097840noreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-61826514823847504222015-07-26T23:51:02.059-07:002015-07-26T23:51:02.059-07:00Karen, that's exactly right (what you said abo...Karen, that's exactly right (what you said about picking apart the experience and thus inviting trauma). There's a part of me, though, that wonders if I'm not FACING it and therefore avoiding it, but then I think that every reader is not going to "get it" or even have it resonate with them. And thank you for the poet's soul comment -- sometimes I think I should just hang up my nonfiction hat and write poetry only!Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03313726816776097840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-12970931143720294572015-07-26T23:48:58.119-07:002015-07-26T23:48:58.119-07:00Thank you AGAIN for such thoughtful and supportive...Thank you AGAIN for such thoughtful and supportive words, Kario. Your comments are always like rich treasures -- I feel like I should print them out and compile a book of them!Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03313726816776097840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-34080795956090287752015-07-26T23:47:49.353-07:002015-07-26T23:47:49.353-07:00Thank you so much for this long and thoughtful com...Thank you so much for this long and thoughtful comment. I have a hard time deciding if criticism is improving my work or not -- I struggle probably too much when it's "negative," get a tad defensive but am painfully aware of the my defensiveness. God. Writers like me can be ridiculously self-absorbed! I do like to be challenged, though -- thank you for what you said about the work knowing best. That's a very cool thought and good advice.Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03313726816776097840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-34362079248912624822015-07-26T23:45:11.712-07:002015-07-26T23:45:11.712-07:00Thanks, Steve. And yes, that outing was a peaceful...Thanks, Steve. And yes, that outing was a peaceful one. I think you'd love the Norton Simon --Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03313726816776097840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-37673102291671779262015-07-26T23:44:37.827-07:002015-07-26T23:44:37.827-07:00Thank you, Alicia D. I really appreciate your thou...Thank you, Alicia D. I really appreciate your thoughts on the critique. I generally take criticism all right, but at the very least I hope to get something from it, learn something about myself, about my writing, etc. I try not to take things too personally or to get defensive, either. Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03313726816776097840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-57761186732635784562015-07-26T23:43:04.560-07:002015-07-26T23:43:04.560-07:00Come on up, Allison! I can't believe it was my...Come on up, Allison! I can't believe it was my first time there, and I will definitely go back.Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03313726816776097840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-35985721831510637232015-07-26T23:42:29.666-07:002015-07-26T23:42:29.666-07:00Oh, lily cedar, you are always so true. I value an...Oh, lily cedar, you are always so true. I value and am blessed by our long blog world friendship. You are a good mother, and your daughter is blessed to have you.Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03313726816776097840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-692392298846769952015-07-26T23:41:11.203-07:002015-07-26T23:41:11.203-07:00Thank you. I always feel you there.Thank you. I always feel you there.Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03313726816776097840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-21805638796449292832015-07-26T23:40:53.055-07:002015-07-26T23:40:53.055-07:00Yes. It's hard to believe, but it does somehow...Yes. It's hard to believe, but it does somehow always work out.Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03313726816776097840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-92171231249255134092015-07-25T13:30:47.568-07:002015-07-25T13:30:47.568-07:00Agreeing with Karoi and the others above - I feel ...Agreeing with Karoi and the others above - I feel that you convey what you are feeling beautifully. Perhaps the reader/writer has no frame of reference for what you experience daily. And as you are still "in it," it seems (to me) tantamount to inviting trauma to pick it apart, looking for feelings. They are obvious in your writing. Any reader with any empathy will get it without you spelling it out. For heaven's sake, you have a poet's soul! Poets don't spell everything out!<br />XOGbergerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08895779471612397202noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-80598382254849545912015-07-25T12:54:29.253-07:002015-07-25T12:54:29.253-07:00{Lily Cedar}{Lily Cedar}Elsewherehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18205062128898300234noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-76914441068634761512015-07-25T08:42:37.126-07:002015-07-25T08:42:37.126-07:00I absolutely agree with Alicia and paddington. In ...I absolutely agree with Alicia and paddington. In my life, one of the things I appreciate the most about my response to challenges and crises is my ability to just do what needs to be done. It is as though my focus narrows and my analytical brain takes the lead in a very crisp, functional way. I have often been told that I am the person people want around in a crisis because of that laser attention to triage. It is afterward, when I am alone and my perspective widens to encompass the enormity of the situation that I just dealt with when I get shaky and succumb to the overpowering emotion. I wonder if the person who gave you that critique doesn't work that way or hasn't faced situations like the ones you deal with on a regular basis and, thus can't truly understand what it's like. In any case, I echo the others who say that your writing conveys beautifully the vast swirl of conflicting emotions and actions that you carry with you. So maybe you have lost that other person's thread, but yours is still firmly tucked in your pocket.<br /><br />I wish you many peaceful days of exploration with Sophie this month, along with some where you lie around and read a book while she wanders in her room. That is what summertime is for, is it not? <br /><br />Love.kariohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10150537989886423212noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-78326599390500643832015-07-25T08:05:42.521-07:002015-07-25T08:05:42.521-07:00I've been thinking a lot about the feedback yo...I've been thinking a lot about the feedback you got, about writing what you were feeling in the midst of crisis. I'm perplexed by the advice, since in the midst of crisis one marshals all energies to just get through it, as you note, and the extreme terror or hell of it, evoked through "showing" is far more powerful and visceral than if the writer pauses to "tell" the feelings, especially since, as you also observe, there is no room for analysis of feelings in the moment of crisis, there is only the meeting of it, and it seems to me every reader can bring to that her or his own sense of the feelings that would accompany such a pass, without being told. I don't know if I am being clear, but I have read some of your writing about Sophie's early days, and for me, the gut-wrenching power of it was in the "showing," and in the fact that you did not get bogged down in "telling." I got the feelings; they were all over the page, bleeding through every word, so I am bewildered by the critique you received about that. Of course not every critique is on target. I generally weigh the feedback, try it out, and if it improves the work I take it, but if I find that I just don't agree once I've weighed it, I respectfully move on, appreciating that the other person cared enough to offer an opinion, but not being beholden to that opinion. In other words, the work knows best. Listen to that voice most closely of all. My two cents.37paddingtonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12400464105403622384noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-65995859374002301472015-07-25T06:54:37.479-07:002015-07-25T06:54:37.479-07:00I can't imagine what it's like to live wit...I can't imagine what it's like to live with that constant tension between wanting the best for your child and seeing your caretaking as an endless path. For what it's worth, I think your feelings come through quite clearly in your writing! The museum sounds (and looks) like a peaceful, interesting outing.Steve Reedhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11684120060438252945noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-10881799914502400432015-07-25T03:48:11.914-07:002015-07-25T03:48:11.914-07:00One of my favorite lines : "I am skilled at h...One of my favorite lines : "I am skilled at holding paradox -- despair and delight -- cursed and blessed -- gravity and humor." <br /><br />Regarding the person at Hedgebrook who wanted more of how you felt in your writing - I have never found that to be lacking on your blog, or in your book. In fact, I would argue that the best memoir writing (Mary Karr, for example) doesn't explain internal affective states, but rather describes events in a way that allows the reader to FEEL something that YOU have stirred up in them. To allow THEM to feel, not explain how YOU feel.... and this is what you do so brilliantly in your writing. So, I disagree with that critique of your work, respectfully :)Alicia Dhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06244714478310893367noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-14944824082351597992015-07-24T20:41:14.346-07:002015-07-24T20:41:14.346-07:00I'm very attached to that museum. I'll go ...I'm very attached to that museum. I'll go back with you guys anytime.Allison Ray Benavideshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10513628963796782490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-19003363955956429452015-07-24T20:31:19.818-07:002015-07-24T20:31:19.818-07:00It's the forever part that grinds you down. M...It's the forever part that grinds you down. Made me want to kill myself sadly. I just couldn't do it anymore. The constant stress was unbelievable. I wonder sometimes how we kept going, how I kept going. But I did. Every morning I would hear her feet hit the floor and the day began. It was kind of like "Groundhog Day" with Bill Murray, only not funny.<br /><br />Glad you had a nice afternoon after all. My life so farhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16721270441968035994noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-49980256992907959872015-07-24T20:18:12.240-07:002015-07-24T20:18:12.240-07:00Witnessing. Witnessing. fullsoulahead.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04053261523883986863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-55976301363779856552015-07-24T19:24:44.623-07:002015-07-24T19:24:44.623-07:00And we do what we can and we do what we should and...And we do what we can and we do what we should and we do what we want and what we don't want. <br />And somehow, it works out. <br />Ms. Moonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09776404747858099919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-1101674823981205082015-07-24T18:45:49.265-07:002015-07-24T18:45:49.265-07:00I can't edit my posts after I see my typos eit...I can't edit my posts after I see my typos either. Bonniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05818180005481080905noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-61808216684299040032015-07-24T18:45:23.683-07:002015-07-24T18:45:23.683-07:00There's a lot I want to say about this thought...There's a lot I want to say about this thoughtful and moving post, but I have company here tonight and am on my phone. I'll be back. Love. 37paddingtonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12400464105403622384noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4863417462909147257.post-23287457137568655222015-07-24T18:44:50.819-07:002015-07-24T18:44:50.819-07:00What were the feelings in the beginning? This kep...What were the feelings in the beginning? This kept me thinking today about it today. <br />Bonniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05818180005481080905noreply@blogger.com