Tuesday, August 7, 2012

How We Do It - Part XV in a series



Sophie's hands were clammy all day and I'd say that clammy hands and feet, along with drooling, come in second behind seizures as most disturbing elements of a life. One means the other and the other means one, and we'll never know for sure what comes first or how to make it stop. We were sitting at the kitchen table eating dinner, Sophie tilting to the left as if her bones had come undone, clammy hands and feet and un-knit bones, an unseen seizure, did it come first or after but never mind, we're not used to it and rather annoyed by it, the boys and I, sometimes. No less Sophie, who is floating, I'm certain, clammy, her mouth a bird's barely open, hungry, plaintive in a speechless way. I spooned food into her mouth and listened to her brothers, their talk as concrete as Sophie's un-knit bones and vowels and clammy hands slipping. I moved my eyes to their's and in the moment it took to look, Sophie's own eyes rotated to the right and upward but in that same moment, the moment that I looked at the boys, I saw her eyes, too, and I said, loudly, STOP SOPHIE, NO, SOPHIE, STOP SOPHIE, NO SOPHIE, as my eyes rotated from the boys to hers and hers rotated away from the right, back and stared right into mine. Eyes were all rotating, and the pause that made room for my shout ended, and they were talking again and I said, Did you see that, guys? I stopped it. I got it just in time, did you see that? Good job, Sophie, I said, we didn't need that one. Oliver put his food down and rotated his eyes upward and around and said, That was A-MAAAAZING, MOM. You're a miracle maker, and then I giggled and rolled my eyes.

16 comments:

  1. You are, you know. A miracle maker.

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  2. Oliver is right - as I'm guessing he often is about this sort of thing.

    This was a gorgeous piece of writing.

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  3. You are, indeed. It is amazing--how you are writing this book.

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  4. The musical quality to your writing here is like somebody has plucked too-taut strings, until the end, when the notes resolve. Stunning. I agree with Ms. Moon.

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  5. well done, E., on so many levels.

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  6. Amazing. It gave me chills.
    Well done, indeed. Do it again!

    The writing was superb too.

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  7. Like Oliver, Miracle maker and A-MAAAAZING are two words I would also add to the already long list of superlatives that describe you and the spiritual connection you share with your children.

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  8. The subject matter: heartbreaking
    The writing: over the top
    The outcome: Elizabeth works directly with God

    In fact that is the subtitle of your blog in my opinion --
    Elizabeth Works Directly with God

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  9. I feel so proud to know you. You are amazing. So very.

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  10. Brilliant is what I have to add here.

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  11. I love the way the writing flows as though it has lost its bones as well. And I love that you all have these ways of relating to each other at the dinner table as though it was a mundane sort of activity, this miracle-making you do.

    Love.

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  12. Oh, Elizabeth. This made me cry. I'm going to carry it with me, especially the relief and the giggles at the end. (Oliver is a little Buddha.) You're so generous with us, giving us this piece, and always giving us all the pieces that make a whole family, a family whole.

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  13. what i love about you is that your writing captures everything so completely. The world inside of a sesame seed, filled with every emotion involved with parenting a special child. as always, i relate... in ways i wish i didnt :)

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  14. can we have a party sometime with Ms. Moon and Vesevius and all your fan club? I want to meet these terrific people. We could toss you in the air and let you body surf over our upraised hands, do some blade running, dance like our bones were unknitted, and celebrate ALL the miracles that happen on this beautiful moon, this shell, this necklace you've created of wisdom, humor, fierceness, love and gorgeous writing.

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