Medical Marijuana Update: Part 6,749,234 in a series

I participated in a webinar today with a national epilepsy group for which I've worked for many years. The guests were Josh Stanley and Page Figi, both Coloradans featured on the recent CNN special titled Weed. Page is the mother of the little girl Charlotte whose refractory seizures have been dramatically reduced since she started taking the high CBD medical marijuana that the Stanley brothers produce on their farm in Colorado. There were only a few of us on the call, and it was very spirited. I'm not sure how the other parents on the call felt -- some were from states that criminalize marijuana, so their chances of even trying the stuff are quite slim -- but I felt like I was pulsing with electricity. The feeling reminded me of the enormous rushes of adrenaline and probably cortisol I've felt over the years whenever the prospect for a new treatment for Sophie arose. Even if there's great hope attached to that prospect, it's still stressful and uncomfortable, and I felt, for much of the day, as if I were jumping out of my skin. I think all the mindfulness meditation has actually made me acutely aware -- mindful -- of the effects of stress on my body. I'm not talking about the literal weight that has accumulated but the actual physical characteristics of stress: my racing pulse and heartbeat, my brain quick and poised, my thinking sharp, my ability to articulate heightened emotions, and a gnawing feeling in my stomach that has nothing to do with hunger.

I've felt like that for much of the day, mainly because I am frustrated by the overall inaccessibility of this product for our children and because I am excited that it might very well help Sophie's seizures. Throw in the fact that we're at the forefront of something that could very well be revolutionary for people with uncontrolled epilepsy -- well, you should understand that state of my nerves.

Did you know that many of the children who are using it successfully have been weaned from their AEDs?

I don't even want to type that in a normal font it's so outrageously wonderful.

I have to settle down, though. I have to be patient. Josh Stanley said that maybe, quite possibly, the high CBD stuff would be available in California by the end of this year and certainly by the beginning of 2014. He spoke about education and advocacy. He cautioned about activism. It's a process, and it's happening.

Help me wait. Talk me down. Still my heart. Unshiver my skin. Bandage my wounds. Lay me down.