I've fallen into a sort of daze the last day or so, my body and mind fluid, amorphous. Taking care of Sophie has never been so easy. I feel nothing but tenderness toward her and none of the crackling anxiety and irritation at my role my plight my duties my responsibilities my aloneness. We.
This morning I woke up terrified but coffee the padding around the house my students the clicking of laptop keys a pan of brown butter cornbread the birds outside the dining room window the musty flowers on the table the piles of books a pink quartz a shell its sound in my ear dispelled the fear.
Reader, did you watch Dear Leader lie today? His white ringed eyes.
Carl told me that the Powers That Be in Washington have determined that a person with cognitive disabilities will not get a respirator should he or she or they need one. I said, We know that already. We is us. We know about the rationing of care.
Someone on Facebook commented that she hopes this actually will change everything. Why do I not believe it will change anything?
I got nothing. Sending love.
ReplyDeleteThe situation is illustrating our lives .Old? Disabled? Poor? Not famous? Single? Out of luck! I'm praying, sending good vibes.
ReplyDeleteI can't even think about Ian or Conner getting it, it is too terrifying. Not getting much sleep worrying about my family and all my Caregifted, autism, special needs families. Sending a virtual hug and love.
ReplyDeleteI'm with you, I see no changes coming. It will take the survivors such a short while to return to normal.
ReplyDeleteHumans and humans and not apt to change. We've already mostly forgotten WWII and how that began and what happened.
ReplyDeleteI think that Sophie will be safe with your tender, careful care.
It won't change everything. I seem to remember past major events that were projected to change everything, and they didn't. (9/11, Y2K, you name it.) Some of my co-workers mentioned today (via Zoom) that they're having trouble sleeping. I haven't been sleeping well either, but I suppose it says something about me that I failed to recognize that as very unusual!
ReplyDeleteI believe it will change everything. Still. Unlike previous events, this affects literally every human being on earth. As the global economy collapses and we regress further into recession and likely depression, it all has to change. We've driven the world to strive only for profits at the expense of workers and the environment. I don't believe things will get better overnight and I think we have a long road ahead of us, but I do see signs and evidence of community and love and hope. Peace and Love.
ReplyDeleteMy cousin is a civil rights lawyer protecting people with disabilities and this week they filed suit so that people with disabilities will get the same level of care. She is infuriated. I guess she didn't know this already. It makes me so sad.
ReplyDeleteThat's an exquisite photo of Sophie. xoxo
ReplyDeleteSophie is dressed in such gay (in the original meaning of the word) colors! It's a joyful image. As is the image of the blossoms. Do you think your 'flow' with caring for Sophie right now is because other responsibilities have been set aside during this time? Whatever the reason, what a nice development.
ReplyDeleteI had a terrible dream last week that I was suddenly 'transported' and was in a war torn Arabic speaking country. I didn't know the language, I didn't know how I got there, and I knew that without my insulin and asthma medication I was a goner. Not too difficult to figure that nightmare out.
Caregiving can be a strain and it can be Meditative... I'm so glad that you too are tapping into the Meditative Qualities of it. That Image of Sophie I just Love! It isn't a Surprise to many of us that those with Disabilities will be forsaken, The Man knows he'd never make it past Triage, probably me either unless they KNEW I was Caregiving for Two Medically Fragile Loved Ones at Home that then The System would have to expensively provide for? It's so transactional, all of it, and I doubt that will ever change either. When Rationing takes place you become just more aware of what Society places Value on and more importantly Who. We all deserve better Leadership than this clusterfuck Administration, let us Hope we can obtain it after the Election? I still don't understand why other Elected Officials behave as tho' this Fool is a Dictator? Surely, as he makes worse and worse erratic and dangerous decisions, they should have a means to get him put to the side and have Saner and Wiser Heads prevail and make the Life and Death decisions for our Nation?!
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