Saturday, February 9, 2019


I haven't written here in over a week, and I haven't visited many of your blogs. I have, mainly, been out of sight. I was helping to take care of my uncle who had a bad fall and was recuperating in rehab and then my house. I was glad to do it as he's family and has been very good to us, but man oh man. Caregiver central. Fortunately, my father and cousin Philip came out this past week and helped me with all things caregiving, so I'm feeling a tad more sane. Here's my cousin Philip getting all the love from me. He is really more of a brother to me than cousin as he lived with my family for a number of years when his parents, my aunt and uncle died, and my parents became his guardians.

I sure do love him. I didn't get a good picture of me and my dad together, although I did get a good picture of my dad wearing a man purse, but I won't post it here. I'll tell you this much -- he looks good even in a bright orange cable sweater AND a man purse.

I went to Portland a week ago with my dear writer friend, Tanya Ward Goodman. She sprang me from the confines of home and caregiving, got us a fabulous hotel room and coaxed me to not only do some writing of the goddamn book but to walk over 12,000 steps on both days we were there! We went to see the glorious Pam Houston, Lidia Yuknavitch and Cheryl Strayed celebrate the recent publication of Pam's new memoir Deep Creek: Finding Hope in the High Country. I haven't yet read it, but I heard her read parts of it, and it sounds beyond beautiful.

I was called up on stage that night with Pam, not because I'm a writer or because I am about to finish my goddamn book, or even because she knows me, but because she was playing Truth or Dare with Cheryl and Lidia, and one of the truths was that she was in a sorority, and one of the dares was for her to sing a sorority song. She was up on stage and turned to the audience to ask whether anyone else was in this particular sorority, and I don't know what came over me, but I revealed that I was (Reader, you might not be aware that I was in a sorority, and it's not something that I talk about nor will I, but even though it's sort of embarrassing in this day and age, I actually found beautiful lifelong friendships and had a smattering of fun back in the day -- plus, you know, Pam Houston was one, too), and there was an enormous roar in the place and I fainted dead away. Just kidding. I raised my hand, and because this was in PORTLAND and everyone there was a Lidia, Pam or Cheryl acolyte, no one else in the entire place (and there were hundreds of women in there) owned up to being in this particular sorority, EXCEPT FOR YOURS TRULY. So, yeah. Pam called me up on stage, and everyone around me yelled at me to GO! so I went. Pam sang and I pretended to sing one of our sorority's stupid songs, and it was actually kind of fun if you like singing with a famous author in front of two other famous authors and an auditorium full of Portlanders. Here's the still photo from the video that Tanya took:

And here I've gone and revealed it to more people. Holy shitoly. Now you know everything about me. Just so you won't hate me, here's a photo of me back in the day at a party. I was not drunk but I was wearing a wig for some reason, and that blue shirt is actually a dress that I tucked into a pair of tuxedo pants. It was 1983, for god's sake, and I was thin.


Here's another one.

How about that clown collar? Underneath was a black velvet dress with a jewel neck. The collar buttoned on. A few drinks later, here I am:

So, there you go, Reader. I showed you what I was doing back last week and then way, way back to when.

What's happening with you?


  1. I'm glad you got a break from caregiving and that you got to visit with your cousin. I really like the photo of you with the wig. You look so cute with curly hair.

    I've been freezing my ass off here but this is supposed to be the last day of the cold thank goodness. Took Miss Katie to see the doc and we have a genetics referral because it's been twenty years since the last one and I would still like to know what's wrong with her brain. She's so much better on the valproic acid, night and day. She enjoys life again. She high fives everyone and hugs everyone, she laughs and most importantly the new agency is wonderful.

  2. Girl! You know how to live. And you've always been beautiful. What a splendid thing to have Tanya in your life to come in and fairy-godmother you away for magical adventures. If anyone deserves them, it's you.
    Great picture of you and your brother/cousin. Your dad has a manbag? He's even cooler than I thought.

  3. I am glad you were "in that particular sorority" because of how you wrote about it and now showed us these magnificient pictures. Also, the wig!

  4. Sounds like a great time with those you share so much history with! Love the flashbacks and I'm glad the reinforcements arrived to give you respite and assist with the Caregiving. Your Dad's manbag and bright cable sweater ensemble that he totally obviously rocked, well, it made me Smile. My dear Mom had bold Style statements that she could carry off and I just loved that about her.

  5. Mostly trying to keep warm up here, where we've had a run of 35-below and are still in the deep freeze and expect to be for another two weeks, though it was only minus-25 this morning so things are looking up. But if you don't have to work in it, like my husband does (raises cattle and has to feed, water, and put bedding straw out, which means wearing gloves, which don't keep your fingers warm in this weather), you can dress up like I do in ski pants and a warm parka with a big hood and a tuque and then mitts over your gloves and Sorel boots and voila! you can take a walk in great glittering beauty! I love it, but don't say so too loudly or my husband gets resentful of my lazy (in comparison) life. -Kate

  6. OK, that's pretty fantastic, that you had a moment on stage with those other fine writers!



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