On Friday, Sophie got a slim white envelope in the mail from her high school in the Los Angeles Unified School District (LAUSD). Here's what it said:
To the Parents of SOPHIE ____________,
A candidate for graduation from Los Angeles Unified School District schools must complete a comprehensive educational program before being awarded a diploma. This program includes the completion of prescribed subjects, both academic and elective with a minimum of 230 credits.
- 12th grade to graduate = 230 credits
- 11th to 12th grade = 170 credits
- 10th to 11th grade = 110 credits
- 9th to 10th grade = 55 credits
As of the above date, your son/daughter has earned 100 credits and consequently is being demoted to the 10th grade.
It MAY be possible for students to make up some or all of the credit deficiencies, providing the counselor's advice is carefully followed when planning for the remaining time in high school.
Remember, THERE MAY NOT BE SUMMER SCHOOL AGAIN THIS YEAR, so it is important your child passes all his/her classes or he/she could be in danger of not graduating.
Blah, Blah, Blah.
So, apparently, Sophie is being demoted to 10th grade due to insufficient credits. There's so much wrong with this letter that I don't know where to start. I don't know whether to laugh or to cry but as laughing generally saves me, while crying makes me feel like shit, I'm choosing the laugh. Picture me as the goofy ostrich running like hell from the beast.