What people survive

Portrait of Bearded Lady and Her Husband

I lowered my needing-to-lose-weight body to the floor this morning, cradling Sophie's head in my lap as she had a seizure and sat there, Indian-style, until it was over. The Husband then carried her to her room, and when she woke up a bit later, I fed her the breakfast interrupted and then dressed her and took her to school. This is a normal morning in our household, and I'm aware, at once, of how fucked-up (apologies to those who hate the cursing) it is and how mundane. A bit later, I read an email from a friend of mine, the beautiful Missy B., who had included an excerpt from a New York Times article about the artist Cindy Sherman and her vintage note-card collection.  Sherman found this particular note-card in a junk store in upstate New York, and it appeared to be nearly one hundred years old. It spoke to me this morning in all its sadness yet utter and hilarious absurdity:

"Fair Deceiver: I did not know until last night that you had a glass eye. Woman you have deceived me and our engagement is off! If I had married you, perhaps I would have found out that you had a cork leg, wore a wig and chewed your gum with false teeth — Anyway, I don’t think you could boil water without burning it. I want a girl that can do several things besides rubbing lip rouge on my cheek. Chase around girlie and get another guy.” 

Staggering Abundance

Irish Sea Cliffs - via intangibility.com

So, it "rained" yesterday in Los Angeles and today is glorious. The sky is impossibly blue and the sun is warm. When I traveled east along Venice Blvd, I knew the beach was behind me, only five miles away, and the mountains ahead were dappled with snow, crystal clear behind the glittery skyline.

That's why we pay the big bucks to live here, reader. Just in case you thought otherwise.

I woke this morning to a beautiful email from one of my oldest friends, a friend who lives by the Irish sea with her little children and Irish literature-loving professor husband. I'd copy the whole email here, but that seems weird. Instead, I'll tell you that her words were like bobbing buoys in the ocean at my back, turning my thrashing in cold to a calm and lazy, stationary float. Thank you, Missy, thank you.

Those buoys have been evident everywhere I turn these days, but Missy's email made me realize that I must recognize them -- and praise what appears to be staggering abundance in my life. I locked eyes with a green-eyed woman named Morningstar during a Tantric meditation in my yoga class on Monday and floated out of it restored. Thank you, Morningstar. A writer friend responded to my cabinporn post by offering me her own cabin near Yosemite whenever I'd like to get away. Thank you, F, thank you. Someone told me about a parenting book that addresses sibling squabbling. I immediately downloaded it and read the first few chapters last night. While I generally hate parenting books (don't get me started on the latest French people make better parents thing), those few chapters were like reading a script that someone had written for a reality show about my boys! Thank you, Anonymous, for this tip. Thank you. The mysterious Radish King, who's also a published poet -- an incredible one -- wrote me and Sophie a poem. I'm not sure whether to publish it on this here little blog, because it's so amazing and powerful and wild that I feel certain the whole blog would go up in a burst of flame and I'm not ready for that. Thank you, Radish King, thank you. Another friend emailed me about a possible job opportunity that would fit my schedule perfectly and seems almost an embarrassing answer to my prayers to the universe for prosperity. Thank you, M, thank you.

Alertness is the hidden discipline of familiarity.

The stairs are your mentor of things

to come, the doors have always been there

to frighten you and invite you,

and the tiny speaker in the phone

is your dream-ladder to divinity.

from David Whyte's poem Everthing is Waiting for You

My Friend Missy

Yeats Tower

One of my oldest friends in the world, a dear and beautiful woman who I went to college with (nearly thirty years ago!) has just moved for a period of time to Ireland with her academic husband and their three children. She has started a blog, and today's entry was what I would call ENCHANTING.

I needed the escape, to tell you the truth, and so might you.

Find it HERE.