Showing posts with label laundry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label laundry. Show all posts

Sunday, October 5, 2014

An Unquiet Sweetness



Every time I walk into the backyard with a load of laundry, the kumquat tree must feel a displacement of air. The blossoms assail me, the scent is heady. I could drop the laundry basket and stand there with my eyes closed, the heat of the sun on my skin, my toes curled into the brittle dead grass and the pink flowers of the silk floss tree that lie scattered everywhere.

It's about lemons, not kumquats, but here's one of my favorite poems:

The Lemon Trees

Listen, the poets laureate
walk only among plants of unfamiliar name: boxwood, acanthus;
I, for my part, prefer the streets that fade
to grassy ditches where a boy
hunting the half-dried puddles
sometimes scoops up a meager eel;
the little paths that wind along the slopes,
plunge down among the cane-tufts,
and break into the orchards, among trunks
     of the lemon-trees.
Better if the jubilee of birds
is quenched, swallowed entirely in the blue:
more clear to the listener murmur of friendly
     boughs
in air that scarcely moves,
that fills the senses with this odor
inseparable from earth,
and rains an unquiet sweetness in the breast.
Here by a miracle is hushed
the war of the diverted passions,
here even to us poor falls our share of riches,
and it is the scent of the lemon-trees.

See, in these silences
in which things yield and seem
about to betray their ultimate secret,
sometimes one half expects
to discover a mistake of Nature,
the dead point of the world, the link which
     will not hold,
the thread to disentangle which might set us 
     at last
in the midst of a truth.
The eyes cast round,
the mind seeks harmonizes disunites
in the perfume that expands
when day most languishes.
Silences in which one sees 
in each departing human shadow
some dislodged Divinity.
But the illusion wanes and time returns us
to our clamorous cities where the blue
     appears
only in patches, high up, among the gables.
Then rain falls wearying the earth,
the winter tedium weighs on the roofs,
the light grows miserly, bitter the soul.
When one day through a half-shut gate,
among the leafage of a court
the yellows of the lemon blaze
and the heart's ice melts
and songs 
pour into the breast
from golden trumpets of solarity.

Eugenio Montale, Selected Poems

Monday, March 25, 2013

On Strike



The pile in the center of the room is clean laundry that I've officially refused to fold. All the rest is dirty. I've decided to go on strike until more gratitude flows my way and flowers are strewn at my feet. I imagine nothing but mushrooms sprouting in their piles.

Monday, February 25, 2013

Light, Candy, Oscar and Laundry Monday


That's a photo of the boys' desk in their room, and yes, there are still Christmas gels on the window and yes, I let them keep that huge jar of candy balls on the desk and have found, actually, that they eat less of it when it's right there in front of them. I thought the light coming through the window this morning was beautiful, even as I folded laundry while sitting on Henry's bed in the quiet, and I'm determined to go for a walk this morning and begin, anew, some exercise. I've got nothing more to say about the Oscars last night other than I thought them exceedingly stupid, particularly Seth McFarlane, and I wondered why in the hell Michelle Obama was there virtually with those weird people in military costume standing behind her, contorting their faces uncomfortably. I can't stand Quentin Tarantino and his violent, ugly movies, so I was disappointed that he won Best Original Screenplay over Wes Anderson's Moonrise Kingdom and I also hate musicals (did you know that about me?) so the musical numbers were excruciating to watch except for Adele who I think is fantastic and projects an aura of honesty and sweetness beyond her celebrity. The high moment for me was Daniel Day Lewis, of course, with whom I've been besotted forever, so thank goodness the night wasn't a complete waste of time. So there you go. A mini-critique of the Oscars from another self-absorbed blogger. Now I'm going back to gazing at the pools of light in my house while I clean.

Monday, October 1, 2012

While I was Acting,



Me, backstage, preparing to "go on."



this piled up:


I can't believe they still expect me to do the laundry.

Monday, September 24, 2012

Gertrude Stein, IEPs, Conservatorships and Books



I'm doing laundry and researching conservatorships. Sophie turns eighteen next March, and I have to divest her of her rights, basically, and become her guardian. Sigh. I'm also preparing for her IEP is this Friday morning, and her teacher asked whether I wanted her to be there. I told him that no, IEPs are always about what she can't do, and I don't want her to hear that. I also don't want to fill what peaceful, hard-working spaces are left in her brain with the educational jargon the IEP demands. Those of you in the know, know what I'm talking about: achieve 65% success with 92% accuracy and 50% prompting. When this involves using a spoon to feed yourself, you get my drift. I'm also listening to a cool recording of Gertrude Stein from 1934, where she chastises the interviewer on what it means to understand a text. I loved reading Gertrude Stein in college -- read nearly everything she wrote and relished the weird cadence of her language, the koan-like nonsense. Evidently, my enjoyment presupposes understanding, and in this one wonderful interview, Stein affirms what I've always believed and never articulated: either you like a book or not, and the liking is the understanding. I wish I'd known that when I labored for hours in an all-male book club in New York City, nodding my head in deferment to wiser minds that appeared to understand but not enjoy. In another life I was married to a PhD student in English literature, and I remember suffering through interminably boring get-togethers and parties where graduate students spoke of literature with verbal gymnastics that made my head spin (I was always a terrible athlete) but never of liking something or disliking something, of joy or its opposite. Do these people even like to read? I asked my husband at the time. Maybe I'm just slightly off -- I've written before of my envy for Gertrude Stein, for her massive head and unattractive hair, for her seeming comfort in her own bulk and obtuseness. After five straight days of exercise and yoga, I can feel every muscle and sinew in my body, and they ache. Would that I were Gertrude in a voluminous black dress, sitting in a salon with a mousy helpmate cooking something delicious in the kitchen, spinning words into stories that make no sense except to those who enjoy them.




Look here. Being intelligible is not what it seems. You mean by understanding that you can talk about it in the way that you have a habit of talking, putting it in other words. But I mean by understanding enjoyment. If you enjoy it, you understand it. And lots of people have enjoyed it so lots of people have understood it. . . . But after all you must enjoy my writing, and if you enjoy it you understand it. If you do not enjoy it, why do you make a fuss about it? There is the real answer.
(via brainpickings.org)

The dryer just binged, so it's back to folding clothes.

Reader, what are you doing today?

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