Friday, December 30, 2011

God forbid


The Mother should ask The Brothers to emerge from the Video Playing Den and vacuum the living room floor. One boy was jabbed by the vacuum by accident so he screamed in "pain," only to have the other boy laugh aloud instead of apologizing. Adele wailed in the background, over the vacuum and the crying and yelling, so The Mother had to raise her voice to even higher decibels and inform The Brothers that they were acting like jerks to each other and spoiled brats to The Mother. The Mother's voice crescendoed and then stopped. She took The Silent Girl out of her wheelchair and walked out the front door. Her neighbor, Tom The Father of Four Children, was across the street, and when The Mother asked him whether he had heard her screaming at The Brothers, he nodded and said I was cheering you on.

20 comments:

  1. If there was a "like" button, I'd click it.p

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  2. Dear Boys, Keep vacuuming. And when you're done tidy your rooms, feed the dog, make the mother toast and tea--and don't forget to clean up the kitchen.
    Love, Another Mother

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  3. I love great neighbors who understand parenting.

    Can't count the number of times I have screamed like a crazy women, only to glance and see that every window is wide, wide open. Better yet is when all the windows are closed and the husband walks in the door and lets you know that he heard it all, loud and clear, word for word, while walking up the sidewalk. Nice.

    Today,Joe proclaimed his boredom, to which I said I could pull up some images of children all over the world, crouched in filthy streets and alleys and starving in barren deserts, "bored" to tears. Literally.

    I am SO good with the Catholic guilt thing.

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  4. I love everything about this post, including the picture.

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  5. Ahh, flashback to life with teenagers. Hang in there, Elizabeth. We know you are a good mother. x0 N2

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  6. Hahaha! That photo was priceless and I do believe I could just hear them with the squabbling.

    You are so funny!

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  7. Ha! Last week I heard a boy make a remark about his dad's height. The son was much taller. The dad made a comment similar to the one I often say. You may be taller but I am smarter.

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  8. You can always send them over for a week of boot camp here. It took me nearly forty years to figure out how they do it but once you learn that they know the buttons to push better than the one who has the buttons it is all downhill from there for them.

    Of course there are always bribes when everything else fails...

    wv:snesuf

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  9. Ah, togetherness! :)

    Thanks for your comment and condolences. I appreciate all the support I've had from blogland!

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  10. LOVE this! best laugh of the day!!

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  11. It sounds as if you have GOOD neighbors.

    There are so many things that boys do, and like to do, that make absolutely NO sense to me: guns, knives, horrible video games, skateboards, boxing, for starters...They are really and truly different from us - "not that there's anything wrong with that," as Seinfeld used to say - but they are more mysterious to me than ever. And this is after having a great dad and brother, male friends, 3 marriages (one of them good - and lasting) and being the mother of a boy (who is now a man). Sheesh.

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  12. oh my, i love this post! real life!

    these are the precious moments families are made of. tom across the street knows it and so do we all.

    happy new year, dearest elizabeth!

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  13. Thanks for the much needed chuckle! I love your neighbors -- mine always pretend they don't hear.

    Happy happy new year!

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  14. Simply my favorite post ever. I want to make this my desktop whatever it's called so i can read it every day when i wake up.

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  15. This is perfect. A Christmas Tale almost Dickensian in its depth and humor and real human anguish.
    Happy Brand New Day
    xo

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  16. Love it. God bless I cheer other parents on rather than judge. God bless they do the same for me.

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  17. That's my kind of neighbor! And I suspect that five minutes after the vacuuming was done both boys promptly forgot about the whole thing.

    When do they go back to school? Sigh.

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