Saturday, September 12, 2009
What We're Up Against, Or
the proverbial apples and oranges...
This is an exact transcript of a "conversation" I just had on Facebook with a cousin of mine. I have deleted the names for privacy but it's otherwise copied verbatim. It speaks for itself, I think, but also brings up such complex issues regarding what it means to be a writer, to write honestly and to one's Truth. (Not to mention any sort of sensible compromise that might be forthcoming regarding our country and healthcare reform.)
(I should explain that this whole exchange happened under the comment of another cousin. I made no reply to that cousin but while reading the status updates came upon the inflammatory comments about myself.)
Cousin: but ya know our idiot cousin in L.A. is saying, "whats up with those people in mississippi"
Cousin: thats after she trashes her mom some more on her "blog"
Cousin: someone should drop a house on her
ME: Wow. [name of cousin]. Did you read my blog and are you disagreeing with my points about healthcare reform? My post was intensely personal as the issue is such an important one to our family, namely our daughter Sophie who suffers considerably from the status quo. Wouldn't you rather engage with me in a way that leaves out personal attack? Or were you counting on me not seeing these comments since we aren't "friends?"
Cousin: no i hoped you would. you should be ashamed of trashing your mom that has worked herself to death to help you. you were out of line. as for personal attacks i guess we are all just tired of being viewed as a bunch of "rubes" when you discuss this with our other aunt.
now on to health care. no i do not agree with your views at all. its not the governments(taxpayer) job to pay your bills. if you are having a hard time the church and family should step in. also a change in employment, place of dwelling, etc. all you have to do is ask. we all love sophie and would do anything for her. it should not be left up to strangers. nobody owes anyone anything.
Me: I'm guessing that you did not read the blog as there is no place in it that I "trashed" my mother. How dare you say these things when you know nothing about my life, my child, my job, where I live and how I live. Nor do you know my friends or community. How dare you judge me? I refuse to get into a war of words, here. I am a mother who does nothing but take care of her family which is why I'm so passionate about the subject. But I also realize that there's no "winning" with this. Clearly, we have nothing to say to one another, and I will rest my case knowing that I did NOT attack you in the vicious way that you did. It's clear that you are happy with the words you've written.
Me: And [my other cousin whose FB page this exchange is taking place on), I'm so sorry that your FB page was used for this. I had no idea this was coming and am sincerely sorry that it was used in this way.
Me: And, [Cousin's name]: I'd like to refute your claim that I am expecting the government to pay my bills. I am not "in trouble." I am passionate about reforming our healthcare system and making it accountable, including the government and the insurance industry. I maintain that it's a moral imperative. Your suggestion that friends and family should step in and help with Sophie's medical care is absurd. If you knew anything at all about our life, you would know this, so I'll just write it off as an incredibly ignorant statement that underlines all that I already believe about those who oppose healthcare reform.
How do you like those apples?